Have been wanting to find my groove and place in the world in the last few months. I have really learned to ease back and start allowing things to flow in the last 8 months. I have such deep desire to have some significant contribution and I get frustrated when I do not see my perceived ideas of what that could possibly mean.
One thing for sure is that the recurring theme has been "Let go and Let God".
I have stressed myself to the point of sickness trying to control circumstances and focusing way too long on the things that are missing or not working. This has been a long long process - so much so that it was the reason why I started this blog in the fist place.
I decided I would pay attention to the little things and stop focusing on trying to see big things happen in my life.
My worst fear is to be mediocre, live a mediocre life, have a mediocre business, be a mediocre person. Some times I feel I am on my way but somehow I keep missing the point. Just by the mere fact that I exist and I am here makes me NOT mediocre. I have a life purpose.
I must say that through out these few months I have experienced true miracles, and feel more and more at ease with my life. I even feel an underlying sense of hope and that is exciting, considering I was in a deep hole of sorrow for many many years. I do know now that EVERY single situation, thing and person in my life has gotten me to the now.
I choose to live one day at a time, one moment at a time and focus on my happiness with now.
I don't even know how to organize my thoughts today - but I will try and write my feelings more every day. I keep feeling the nudge to do the following and I am writing them here for accountability to myself:
- Meditate every morning for at least 15 minutes
- Journal every morning and every night
- Work out 20 minutes a day
- De-clutter - make room for the new
I am challenging myself to do this for the next 30 days.
I have to listen to my inner being... and see where it takes me.
